Bryan Washington's story collection “Lot” imaginatively delved into the fictional lives of a variety of characters in Houston. He movingly portrayed the numerous conflicts and strong bonds to be found amongst families, friends and neighbourhoods as well as many different ethnic and socio-economic groups. His debut novel “Memorial” is a kind of extended story you might have found in that collection but concentrates on couple Benson and Mike whose relationship is severely tested when Mike leaves their home in Houston to reconnect with his estranged dying father in Osaka. Although they alternately narrate this novel we also get glimpses into the lives of their families, neighbours and the larger community so there's a wonderful kind of plurality to Washington's narrative. This is also one of the most complex and honest portrayals of a modern-day gay relationship I've ever read. Although there is a strong emotional and sexual bond, this story lays out much of the ambiguity and uncertainty that exists between them. These elements can be found in many relationships, but there are specific challenges which African-American Benson and Japanese-American Mike face being a same-sex couple. Washington shows how these elements of their identities certainly don't define them but have a persistent impact on how they interact with the world and each other.
It felt really true the way Benson and Mike never really define their relationship. From meeting on an app and a mutual acquaintance to living together to Ben being in the strange position of co-habiting with Mike's mother when he leaves, the state of their connection is uncertain and fragile. Neither is particularly good at communicating how he feels so these unwieldy emotions are primarily expressed in fights and sex. Is this an extended hookup? A loving affair? A marriage by another name? Roommates with benefits? The reader is never entirely certain because Benson and Mike aren't certain. I've been in relationships like this and know lots of gay couples that live in this state of uncertainty.
I think the variables involved are due in part from them both being obstinate men who don't want to commit one way or the other, but also because gay relationships aren't given the same credence as heterosexual relationships in their families and community. This is an effect of both external and internalized homophobia. When we meet them their respective families fully accept their sexuality, but it wasn't always so and the painful rejection Benson experienced when he admitted to his family that he's not only gay but HIV+ is still intensely felt. Details of these factors are gradually revealed as pieces of the story are recounted by both men. It makes the moments of silence or unemotional communication between them all the more meaningful.
One of the powerful ways Washington represents this is in a series of photos of their respective urban environments Benson and Mike message each other. We get the context of when both men are sending and receiving these images so understand their respective positions and abiding desire for a connection but it doesn't make it clear how their relationship will go forward. It says a great deal without using any language. This tension is movingly sustained over the course of the novel as both of their lives are evocatively brought to life with the details of their day to day interactions in Houston and Osaka.
I really appreciated the way the author represents the perspectives and voices of many different people in his story, but I felt the dialogue didn't always ring true. There are certain turns of phrase which are used by a number of characters. It'd be understandable if it was just Benson and Mike who speak the same way, but both Mike's separated parents and a man who works in Mike's father Eiju's bar in Japan use similar expressions at different points. This would occasionally take me out of a story I otherwise wholly believed.
Overall, I admired how this novel let its tale gradually unfold in many low-key scenes involving cooking or working or waving to neighbours. It's stated at one point how “The big moments are never big when they're actually fucking happening.” “Memorial” shows how some of the most dramatic decisions in our life often aren't ever definitively settled but result from circumstance and a resounding ambiguity about which direction we want our lives to go and who we want to be with.
